At the age of five, I walked down the aisle of my home church. I made a public confession of faith. I was even baptized. But I was not a true believer. I didn’t know that then. It would take almost seventeen years for me to figure that out.
I cannot remember a time when I didn’t know that I was a sinner and that Jesus died on the cross to save sinners. I would try really hard to live sin free, fail miserably, assume that God hated me and was allowing hardship to punish me, confess my sins to avoid God’s displeasure and punishment, and finally try really hard to be good once again. My faith was performance based and I had no concept of what it meant to rely on the finished work of Christ.
In college, the Lord led me into a friendship with a young man who was passionate about Biblical theology. He introduced me to the works of John Owen, John Piper, and my beloved Charles Spurgeon. I began wrestling with my faith and with what I believed. In my final summer in college, Christ became a stumbling block for me because I finally understood that my performance would never be enough. I realized that all of my righteousness was truly as filthy rags and that the Father would only accept me on the basis of Christ’s life and death. I actually felt frustrated because I longed to be “good enough.” Mercifully, I began reading The Power in Prayer by Charles Spurgeon. While reading that book, I understood that God never expected me to be good enough. I had access to the Father through Christ’s righteousness and on the basis of what Christ had done and that’s because He loves me just as I am. For the first time, I approached the Father “in the name of Jesus” alone.
In the decades since I first relied on Christ alone, the Lord has allowed me to grow and mature in my faith. I have survived some of the bleakest and darkest days of my life and have found that the joy of my salvation is truly my strength. Through it all, I have discovered a passion for teaching the true Gospel to women and children and the Lord has used me to mentor and disciple others. Most recently, I have enjoyed facilitating others in a rapid read through of the Bible and teaching others how to engage their whole hearts in Bible study and prayer. I look forward to encouraging other believers through the written word and encouraging all to find their life in Christ!
Gospel-Centered Joy 